Advantages of having a preemie

First of all, let me just state the obvious: having a preemie is NOT a desirable thing. I'll probably always have the urge to punch the women who "really hope they deliver early because they are SO uncomfortable!" Having a preemie is hard. Really hard. Not something I would wish on my enemy. It will probably take years of therapy for me to really get over the experience. But I like to be a glass-half-full kind of person, and I always try to see the good that comes with the bad.  While having a preemie is probably 99% bad, there is some good that comes with it. I've thought a lot about these good things and tried to focus on those instead of all the stress and anxiety that comes with the bad.

With that said, here are some of the best parts of having a preemie:

(1) I got to meet my sweet babies early. This is something I've thought about a lot, because you really do love your child more and more every day.  By the time I reached my due date, I had already known my kiddos for almost 3 whole months. I knew their personalities, I knew how to calm them, and I was completely and totally head over heals in love with them. I know women always say they love their babies before they are even born, but it's just different once they are born. Before I delivered, I loved my children, but more than anything I loved the idea of them. I knew I would do anything to protect them, but I just couldn't possibly love them like I do now. I feel very blessed to have watched them grow from a tiny 2 pound babies that needed a lot of help into strong, healthy newborns. Obviously it wasn't all rainbows and sunshine for 3 months - it was a very stressful time, but it was delightful to get to know my sweet babies.  Just look at them in all those photos where they weren't even supposed to be born -- how could we have missed out on the cuteness?


(2) I learned a lot about parenting before my babies came home.  I spent basically all day every day in the NICU with the babies.  On day one, I didn't understand anything the doctors and nurses were saying to me. By the end, they were offering me a job (kidding, obviously, but I really could do their whole job…. at least with respect to my own kids). I learned how to change diapers, how to give them a bath (so that they actually like it), how to take their temperature, what to look for to make sure they are breathing right, what to do if they choke, etc. etc. etc. The list goes on forever. The bottom line is that by the time Alexis came home, I was READY. I always assumed I would be one of those parents that freak out when they leave because they know nothing about raising a child.  Well I'm not saying I know everything, but in terms of day-to-day baby care, I know about as much as any other parent.




(3) My kids are on a schedule. In the NICU, your baby eats every 3 hours. They get changed every 3 hours. They get a bath on Wednesdays and Saturdays.  When our babies came home, we just kept that schedule going. We still give baths every Wednesday and Saturday. We still feed them (roughly) every 2.5-3 hours. We even have the same routine - change baby, feed baby, swaddle baby, let baby sleep. Repeat. Although obviously you have to throw in some "  The few times I have tried to deviate from this schedule have not gone well.

(4) My babies are used to noise. The NICU is LOUD. Alarms going off constantly. Screaming babies in every corner. Family visiting and chatting all over. Nurses yelling across the room.  Your babies just get used to it and sleep right through it. When we got home we didn't have light sleepers. You don't have to keep your voice down when they sleep. You just go about your business and they sleep through it.  Unfortunately that seems to be changing now that they don't have the NICU noise, but it was really nice while it lasted!

(5) It's easy/easier to shed the baby weight.  When I was pregnant, I was really worried about the "twin skin" (don't google it. It's gross).  Seems very common that people who have twins often have a big sack of skin leftover for a really long time after delivery.  I never had that (although as I've mentioned already, I would gladly still trade this for a full-term delivery!). Plus, when you deliver at 6 months, it's pretty easy to lose the weight.  I was able to walk around and drive myself 5 days after delivery, and fit into my pre-pregnancy pants less than a month after delivery. I got back to my normal pre-pregnancy weight (or at least close to it) in about 2 months.  So that's nice I guess. On the other hand, I really still grieve the loss of my full-term pregnancy. After I delivered I really missed being pregnant for a long time. I think when you carry to term and are fat and miserable, you are relieved when the baby arrives. I never had that. But this is a post about the good parts of having a preemie, so enough about that.

(6) I have a freezer full of breast milk.  I started pumping the day I delivered, and pumped 8-10 times a day until they came home (when I was able to start nursing more).  Since 2 pound babies don't eat a whole lot, I was able to save most of what I pumped, and only needed to bring in a fraction of what I produced.  Now that they are full newborn size, they eat everything I produce right away, and there isn't any extra. But I have a whole freezer full of breast milk that I can either use when my supply can't keep up with two giant babies, or for when I return to work.  It's really nice to know that I have a good backup… if I decide I want to drink alcohol and am worried about feeding it to them, I can just throw it away because I have plenty of extra.  It's a luxury not everyone has, and I'm fully aware of how lucky I am to have the extra supply.

Here is about 1/10th of what we have in the freezer: